Glasses

I'm getting new bifocals! (kinda, not really)
They're gunna be so colourful and rad =)
Oh yess.. and they're gunna be extra, extra thick
(just in case I'm found in a situation similar to the one below)=P



LOL

Resolutions?

As the end of the year approaches a majority of ppl follow that "New Years Resolution" B.S. (excuse my french).

Personally, I've never really associated resolutions with the new year. Why not start every new day with a resolution and follow that through. Why does the start of a year have to represent a change? Why wait that long to do something for yourself?

So.. my new year resolution, however contradicting this might be, is to start everyday with a resolution ;) =P

Some of my day starters include:
wake up earlier if went to sleep earlier; OR wake up late if went to sleep late
(or just to wake up non-groggy lol)
be on time for everything
(EVERYTHING! even those dumb one hour 8am-ers)
drink more water and eat more fruit and veggies
(how about... try and squeeze in breakfast everyday)
Oh yess.. and get me some A's in school!! (lol)
(slowly day by day)

A Dying Lover's Wish

Next time I'll tell you what I'm thinkin
Those cigarettes and all your fun
I shoulda stayed inside, ignored
But inside I was dying, was bored

Everything doesn't look like the movies
Nothing was started so nothing has to end

Still you take me away
and you take your time.
Moving the world
and shaking the sun.

All the guilt we were building
Stood and paved a road to something new
Should we listen?
There's nowhere else to turn

Move a little closer but don't say a word
I don't want to know.
Just breathe, slow ..
and lean towards me.

Heart to heart, soul to soul.
I need this more than you know.

No guilt.
No emotion.
A dying lover's wish.


Or should it be a lover's dying wish? lol hmmm

I came up with this listening to various songs on the radio haha (JT and RiRi's -Rehab, amongst one).

Merry Christmas!!

Wishing everyone a wonderful Christmas. One filled with love, joy, and happiness.

All the best to you's and your families.

Hope Santa was fair to you this year ;)

"Christmas is forever, not for just one day,

for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away

like bells and lights and tinsel,

in some box upon a shelf.

The good you do for others

is good you do yourself "

- Norman W. Brooks

I don't want to say this aloud

I can't express myself today,
cant say anything out loud,
a lack of words to describe this feeling.

Lost.

I dont want anything.
Actually... I want everything.

I want time
I want knowledge
I want music
I want the world

What can I do?
What can I actually achieve ?
How much is reality? How much is a dream?

How can one be fulfilled
when their happiness is empty
too big it must be
the smell of it disgusts me
because how? when? and what should I do to achieve it?

It's difficult. It is. I tried working at it.
I should just keep doing something,
Doing something is better than sitting on the arse and pondering, dreaming..
it won't come like that.

Just saddens me.
Why today, out of all days, does this feeling have to seep through?
It's hidden on a regular basis.. hidden by a thin layer of crust.
But under this crust is something hot, something alive, and in motion ..that is ready to explode.
Ready to surpass everything in its way.
Destruction or Desire?

What is it?
I can't figure it out.
Something is inside of me but it can't come out.
Something is blocking it.. and I dont know what that is..
What wants to shine through.. and why isn't it coming?

What is it that I want?

The worst feeling, this feeling, not knowing
.. it sits there.. for me to figure it out.
But how?
It's so tormenting. So frustrating.
Just seep through dammit.. make this easy.

Madame Dubois

LOL well here's smtn unexpected.

My name is mentioned in Cinderella!
Cinderella! how lovely!
Yes, I was watching the Disney classic.. but from a different perspective.. that of a 21 yr old not 8 yr old lol.,. and it is such a fun and clever movie!

Anewho if you click the link.. and go to time 8:38.. you'll here it :D
.. and I thought my name was strangely unique =P
I bet Madameoiselle Dubois doesn't spell hers with a 'Y' though.. although its odd our last names are quite similar..

Also funny.. n I'm sure my bf will agree.. that I am a daughter of a general haha! how strange!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QBN0yfgjNM&feature=related

King John of Canada

Let it snow, let it snow~ says the King of Winter.

On this beautiful snowy day I've begun reading a rather interesting book I picked up a couple of days ago from the library. The novel, specifically, "a novel of the near future" written by Scott Gardiner, is a political one that describes a series of accidents (or rather, political errors) that lead to a King of Canada. Imagine! A Canadian monarchy! I've read about 50 pages of the novel.. and it is something else! It is funny, clever, and enraging (at some points I just felt like slapping the author haha).. I am definately enjoying it!

Let me give you an example of something I found rather mind boggling:

"There's a game we used to play, a parlour game I guess you'd call it, the kind of riddle you can only have played on you once and then must play on others. We called it My Aunt Minnie, but I'm sure it goes by other names. The object of the game was to figure out why Aunt Minnie liked certain things but didn't like others. It was a logic game, with a very clear connection linking all of Minnie' preferences ( Aunt Minnie likes connections but not things joined). You played it with a group so those who'd figure it out could help torment those who hadn't. (Aunt Minnie likes puppies but she doesn't like dogs). The first stage drives you crazy- then comes epiphany- and much glee afterwards in adding to the distress of those for whom enlightenment hasn't yet descended: My Aunt Minnie likes the moon but doesn't like the sun. Aunt Minnie likes darkness but she doesn't like dark. Does she prefer the night or the day? Aunt Minnie likes neither night nor day- though Minnie is partial to the afternoon. As individual playes solved the puzzle, they'd begin to add their own contributions. Minnie likes kittens but she doesn't like cats. Minnie likes swimming but she doesn't like to have swum. Minnie hates autumns but she does love the fall...... Minnie likes any word with double letters" p.27

The author adds some Canadian history, mentions Canadian art, and there is even an international award that the King initiates- "the Golden Leaf" (somewhat like a Nobel Prize)! I haven't gotten to how the King becomes King.. it is written from the perspective of his best friend, the Royal advisor. I enjoy reading about things that are known to me- like the Muskoka woods, the Royal York Hotel in Toronto, and old city of Montreal (they're all mentioned).

Anewho to wrap this up.. all of this really sparks an interest in politics. I'm going to keep reading political novels.. no matter how boring they are (lol) because as a voter I need to understand this country (I've kinda lost track of what's what and who's who). Like, are we still a colony? a rhetorical question. I'm not quite understanding the governor general bit. I need to step back to Grade 8 Canadian history lol (talk about being honest :P) .. and all this asking her permission to run away from parliament? and the backstabbing of Harper? A coalition? WTF? who's side are these ppl on?

Glam of the 1940's-1950's

I've been youtube'ing a lot lately.. searching for some glam. Searching for something fun, something me, and something different. I must have watched about 50 videos.. lol.. and I found that the era 1940-1950.. is unbelievably awesome. I'm in love with the music, in love with the actors, with the dancers.. and the women! They were so sophisticated and proper.. so classy. The women definately outshun the men!

My favourite actress would have to be Rita Hayworth ( a video I have below) and my fav female dancer would be Cyd Charisee (also below). In the male category.. I was intrigued by the performances of Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, James Dean, and Rock Hudson. Ooof!

Actress
Rita Hayworth,Gilda, 1946



Cyd Charisse, Meet Me in Las Vegas, 1956

Am I.. or Are They?

This past week I've been attracting all sorts of weird incidents.
I'm not a believer of bad luck- but lately it seems that bad luck is all I've been attracting. It obviously isn't an extreme case of 'unlucky'.. but it is peculiar how everything panned out. So my question is.. am I the unlucky? or are they?

Omitting the minor cases (of which this idea would be viewed as an obsession).. three major things leave me concerned:

1. The Driveway Hit n Run Incident
On a snowy Saturday, a minivan (I believe it was a Chrysler) didn't make the turn leading to my house and hit my car which was parked on the driveway. The car skid about 90 degrees onto my front yard. The fate of the minivan? He hit the tree, pulled out of the drive way.. and fled the scene. Damage- bumper, lights, trunk, and dents in my car. All is good with insurance though. Evidence- the dude fled but left behind a piece of his license plate covering; which has a phone number engraved. I C.S.I'd that shit (mainly googled lol) and found out where the car was purchased.. bad news is, so what? I have no license plate number; don't even have the exact model of the car- it was dark. On the bright side: have an even hotter rental to drive now ;)(until my car is fixed) Ballerrrr!

2. Corneal Abrasion
There's a small price to pay for looking good. In short, I tossed the geeky glasses and got too comfortable wearing contact lenses. The outcome: month old contacts, stress, and a particle in the eye= scratched cornea. One word : pain! My eyeball was scratched, red, swollen- it was very difficult to open it, difficult to read, and painful to look at anything that emitted light.

3. Bus Accident
Today on the way to school (to write my final exam..yaa!) the 30 bus, going about 50-55 km/h wammed a minivan that forgot to stop when coming out of a car wash. Please, who does that? You're supposed to look both ways when pulling out onto a busy street. The sound of two vehicles colliding is unpleasant.. and very bumpy. Noone was hurt- and the bus driver was a very kind man, he handled everything professionally. The damage: minivan (also chrysler) torn off bumper; disfigured front (it looked like someone took scissors n cut the anterior of the car off- shock!).. the bus was in mint condition though =) lol.. thank Gosh nothing happened, and thank Gosh buses are built to ensure out optimal protection!

Shall I also mention.. the truck that ran a red light on the yonge/dundas intersection while pedestrians had right of way to cross from all directions?
Or driving on a small road when WHAMO a chick from a parked car swings her door open full length, full speed. Shit.. I've never been so ticked off b4 at the carelessness of ppl.

My conclusion: Not only do you have to think for yourself but you have to do the extra work and think for others to keep yourself safe.

Swing Sally Swing

Betty Boop a forgotten classic!
Now this is dance =) Sally Swing brings it to the floor lol.

Lately I've been inspired by the swing/jazz era of the early 20th CE. The dancing, the music, and of course the movies- are all amazing! It's a good thing we still have some record of this era- we can imagine what living @ that time was like.
The sudden like and urge for the revival of this music was intrigued by a somewhat dull night out this week. The bar/club we went to was so dry.. and the dance floor was full of wall flowers.. which annoyed the heck outta me lol.



I love how in the opening scene: Science is Golden (lol).. and I've never seen Jewish guys portrayed like that in any cartoon b4!
This one was taken from 1938- I checked out other cartoons from that era and they were so racist and stereotypic :S what a different world!

Britney Vs. Lily Allen; Womanizer

Hmmmmmmmmm...

Kinda like Lily's version more.
It's more jazzy n classy..
<3 that

(click title of blog for link)

The Young Folks

This song was stuck in my head 4 the longest time:



If I told you things I did before, told you how I used to be
would you go along with someone like me?
If you knew my story word for word, had all of my history
would you go along with someone like me?

I did before and had my share, it didn't lead nowhere
I would go along with someone like you
It doesn't matter what you did, who you were hanging with
We could stick around and see this night through

We don't care about the young folks, talkin' bout the young style
and we don't care about the old folks, talkin' 'bout the old style too
and we don't care about our own folks, talkin' 'bout our own stuff
all we care about is talking, talking only me and you

Usually when things have gone this far, people tend to disappear
No one would surprise me unless you do
I can tell there's something goin' on, hours seem to disappear
Everyone is leaving, I'm still with you

It doesn't matter what we do, where we are going to
We can stick around and see this night through

And we don't care about the young folks, talkin' bout the young style
and we don't care about the old folks talkin', 'bout the old style too
and we don't care about our own folks, talkin' 'bout our own stuff
All we care about is talking, talking only me and you

Starry Eyed

Scratch. Black. Ouch.

Walking starry eyed.
The feeling that everyone stares at you.. disgusted by you?
Thanks friend.
But maybe it is just you. Maybe they're not paying you any of their mind.
It's your imagination toying with you//
they can't help their curiosity.
So they stare.

Its the hurt that causes you not to forget.
Its contantly there, the pain.
It makes you feel ugly.
Unapreciated.
Can't look at the mirror- at this monster.
It's personal disgust. It's physical, mental.. crazy.

Just a matter of time when you can feel normal again.

Imagine..
Not able to see yourself anymore.
Not able to see anything anymore.
That is pain. It bottles curiosity.
Closes your sences.

But soon it will be over.
Soon you can stare back at them.
Soon you can be them..
while someone else, starry eyed, is frightened of themself.

--> Written about my starry left eye, the corneal abrasion, that kept me in pain for about two weeks. It wasn't very pleasant (lol), I missed 3 exams cuz I couldn't see straight and couldn't focus on anything that was bright.

Happy Birthday...

... to me!!

Age is inevitable. Growing up is an option.
As soon as exams r over>> it's time to partay ;)

Never felt soo..

betrayed and angry.

The dude fled the scene// I watched in shock as he drove off!
I did actually hope he would come back.. but he didn't.
How do ppl like that live with themselves? How do they have the courage to run like that? I don't get it.
Now my car is damaged =(

If a Girl Wants to Dance

I rather feel like expressing myself now,
and I can certainly use a release!
You don't need to be formal or cute about it!

To You, My Friend

What happened to you, my friend.

Where have you gone, why have you left me?

Lonely and empty is my life without you here.
Your smile, your cheap jokes, I loved you dear.

Where did you go? Why did we part?
How did this happen, such a burden on my heart.

Were we nothing? Were we just a one time deal?
I thought our friendship was solid. I thought it was real.

When did this happen? How did we drift so far?
I heard you moved out and have your own car.

If I saw you one day, just passing by
I'd greet you ever so warmly but inside I would cry.

I lost you somehow and I feel cold cuz deep down I know,
It was me who pushed you away: so bitter, so cold.

What I do now see is that you're a call away.
But we're both so busy- different lives. There we go pushing our frndshp astray.

Although the days go by and I sometimes forget,
the good times we've shared to the loss of memory r not a threat.

Just know, and this gives me great peace,
that you were a highlight in my life-and u are greatly missed.

You've left an imprint on my soul; in my life, played a big part.
I'd see you everyday -didn't know how fortunate I was- it hurts me now, like a dart.

All of our memories and all of our silly rants,
stay dear to me, my heart. Together we eliminated all the Cants.

The Coulds, the Woulds, the Shoulds and Regrets,
all that gone, why should they be present?- they're just inner debts.

So to you my friend,
remember me well.. this is not a good bye just an emotional spell.
I wish you..
with all the honesty and truth in my heart
that you achieve your desires
and get everything for which you aspire.
I might see you soon; could tell you in person, non-complex.
But words on paper for me r better expressed.

(And I promise that on our birthdays of thirty:
we will read all our 'books', sing all our songs, relive the bouncing beds and secret closets, roll up the transfers, squirt milk from our noses, dance to our favorite rhythms, drink our favorite drinks, share lipgloss and curling irons, bring old and new bf's into view.. a celebration of us!
like we pacted we would do)

Don't Call Me Baby

Seriously.

I've always hated being called that word.
Makes me shiver.
It's so demeaning to me..
so cold.. so meaningless.

orr..it could be just me lol.

But I def. feel no guilt in calling this hottie 'baby', baby =P